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honey,

i get it. no one’s ever kissed you quite like that, and when he touches you, everything’s a little brighter, leaves aren’t just green, but about a hundred different shades of it. i get it. he calls you beautiful and calls you his and it’s what you always imagined being a woman would feel like, and it’s almost enough to make you forget about the bruises when he puts his fingers under your chin and you kiss and he tells you this. but you can’t take the dead thing off the side of the road, scoop out the insides from its rib cage, and make something pretty out of them, the same way the smell doesn’t go away just because you don’t think of it.

i know this story better than you think you do. your body will never forget the shock, the touch, or the sick hands it belonged to. $60 a week won’t be enough to make you forget, and, honey, if you’re not careful even your therapist won’t keep you from writing love letters to bad men.

the next one’s name will burn a hole right through your mouth, and it still won’t be enough for you to stop. you’ll let him rip out your throat and make ashes out of your tongue because he likes you better that way, silent and somehow still apologizing, only there to be a warm body in his bed and always a step away from dead. a story as old as time – the lamb in the moment of sacrifice looking at the lion and saying sorry. when it’s bad, it could almost crush your chest, and when it’s good, well it’ll be the only reason you’re still there, but honey, it’s a patchwork quilt made more of your blood than anything else.

you take your clothes off for the blade, and you take your clothes off for him, somehow the knife is always softer.

don’t you want your heart and body to know what it feels like to be touched gently?

put your mouth around hands that would want to give you pain and bite down hard, spit out his name and dig it a grave.

forget that thing you heard about love having to hurt sometimes, remember it should never taste like blood, there can still be so much left clean of this body if you let it.

i’m sorry,

the girl who should’ve been stronger when you needed her to be TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/natalia-vela/2019/04/forget-that-thing-you-heard-about-love-having-to-hurt-sometimes/

1. Never get mad at her for being cautious. If it takes her a while to let down her walls, don’t throw a fit about it. Accept that it has nothing to do with you. It has to do with her and her past. She needs time. You can either act patient or walk away — but don’t make  her feel guilty over her insecurities.

2. Never come home late without letting her know. All you have to do is send her a text. Give her a warning. Let her know you’ve hit traffic or your boss has requested you stay late. If you forget to fill her in, she is going to spend hours wondering where you are. She is going to assume the worst.

3. Never flirt with other women. You might think it’s harmless — but your girlfriend doesn’t feel the same way. If you respect her, if you care about her, if you don’t want to hurt her, then you won’t flirt with your waitress or bartender or cute coworker. You will remain faithful in the fullest sense of the word.

4. Never dodge her questions. If you laugh at something on your phone and she asks you who you’re texting, answer her. If you go out with friends and she asks who showed up, answer her. You don’t have to go into detail, but at least give her a quick explanation. If you avoid answering, she is once again going to assume the worst.

5. Never lie to her (even about small things). She already finds it hard to trust. If she finds out you’ve lied to her or misled her about something, she is never going to believe a word you say again.

6. Never give her a reason to doubt you. Show up when you say you’re going to show up. Follow through on your promises. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Prove to her that she can trust you. If you give her even the tiniest reason to doubt you, she is going to pull herself away.

7. Never keep secrets from her. Never sneak around behind her back. Never hide anything from her. Be honest with her. Be blunt with her. Let her know how you’re feeling. Don’t keep her in the dark. Don’t make her wonder whether you can be trusted.

8. Never drool over other women. You’re allowed to find other people attractive — but you shouldn’t go on and on about the celebrities you wish you could bang. You shouldn’t make your girlfriend feel inadequate. You shouldn’t push her toward jealousy, push her to draw comparisons, push her to hate herself.

9. Never joke about cheating. It’s not funny. It’s not clever. It’s not going to make her laugh. It’s only going to make her wonder whether there is any truth behind the humor. It’s only going to make her feel even more insecure than she already does.

10. Never cheat on her. It’s one of the worst things you could ever do to her — and she is never going to forgive you for it. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/holly-riordan/2019/04/10-things-you-should-never-do-to-a-girl-with-trust-issues/

Venus is finally back in a sign she is happy in so eventually we will get the best expressions of this planet. Pisces is Exalted in this celestial body, in other words, it has VIP access to this energy and is able to utilize the planet of love magically. Ultra-Romantic vibes will be the theme of this transit so there will be an air of demonstrative expressions from those you are in relationships with or if you are single your person of interest steps up their game in a very seductive way.

Some of the energies you will see regarding relationships and dating during this significant sign change:

· People will be more open with their emotions and not afraid to show their sensitive side

· You will attract those who prefer substance over superficial things like personal appearance

·Fate and magic will fill the air causing you to stumble upon karmic people

·  The one you are crushing on will show their interest in a cute yet sensual way

·  Flirtation will be at an all-time high making it easy to meet open people

·  Spiritual connections seem to fall out of the sky

·  A higher chance meeting a soul-mate

· Romantic gestures are shown in an over the top way

· Sensitive and sweet people show up and lend a compassionate hand or ear

· Genuine individuals come into your life and want to get to know you for who you are on the inside out

How Will Venus in Pisces Affect Your Zodiac Sign?

Pisces is going to bring some dreamy vibes to your love life and your Zodiac Sign. I recommend using your Moon, Rising, and of course, your Sun Sign to get the most out of this portion of the reading. You can even mix or match to see how your Astrological make-up fairs in love.

Aries

Single and Mingling: Your sign doesn’t have a reputation for being inward, but this is a time for you to connect with your introspective side. Take your time and think about what kind of love you want to manifest to yourself. You will be surprised what this month will bring for you because just when you feel there is no hope, you will meet a person you connect with on a true karmic level.

All Coupled Up: Your relationship connects on a level that is better than where it was, you go from being surface level with one another to allowing yourself to surrender and just be in love. The romance between you two is finally at a place where you are on the same wavelength. Use this time to create a romantic evening that involves music and dancing.

Taurus

Single and Mingling: Venus is your ruling planet and is now in a sign that is compatible for you, so this is going to be a fabulous time for meeting your other half. You might feel more social than usual and ready to enjoy the spring with friends who will put you in the right circumstances to meet someone worth your time. Try hanging out at places that involve group activities that are interactive because that will put you in the right place at the right time to meet that new person of interest.

All Coupled Up: Things in your relationship become more lively causing you and your partner to become extra adventurous. The two of you are all about making plans that take you to new heights, so it’s going to be all about exploring and attempting things you were too nervous to try. All of this fun outside of the box excitement will bring a new-found closeness and a ton of romance to your union.

Gemini

Single and Mingling: Magnetism is going to be the vibe you are omitting so there will be no problem getting noticed during this transit. It is like your ability to communicate with others sparks new interest in you from those who might have been too much in their own world to notice that you have substance. Without even trying your ability to be social will appeal to others causing dating potentials to come out of the woodworks. Also, a tremendous opportunity comes your way to get fixed up with someone worth your time. The matchmakers in your life will be people you network or work with, those are the ones who can get you in front of the right person.

All Coupled Up: The soul connection with you and your special someone will become more evident than ever before. You two will go through a transformation this month on a spiritual and romantic level that causes your relationship to be more connected.

Cancer

Single and Mingling: You are so over the Cancerian homebody stereotype you have been labeled as and are ready to show the world how you play. This is also going to be how you handle your dating life, you will be social and optimistic, opening yourself to all the possibilities. One of the best ways to capitalize on this transit would be going out to cultural events because that would be a fantastic place to meet that special someone who has substance. Also, there is a chance of meeting someone on a dating app that lives a distance away, but for some reason, the two of you are able to make it work.

All Coupled Up: The two of you are learning how to be generous with your time. Because of this romance will be off the charts and the bonus is it will bring out the connection. The faith you guys have for one another becomes restored. Also, if you want to add more magic to your union plan a trip away so you guys can connect without the same day-to-day distractions.

Leo

Single and Mingling: You’re looking for something that is not on a surface level, and luckily that is the types you will meet during this time. Your natural magnetism will pull in the types that are looking for a deep connection, and the remarkable thing is that karmic energy gives you a higher chance than usual to meet someone who has soul-mate vibes. Some of the best spots to hang at to up your chances are places that are edgy, like your local dive, a pool hall, or a venue that is having a battle of the bands.

All Coupled Up: Any issues you have been having with your partner regarding going to the next level finally gets resolved peacefully. The two of you are able to move forward and transform your situation-ship from “What are we” to actually being in a committed relationship. So, any of the gray areas of your union that left you feeling like you were treading water will be resolved.

Virgo

Single and Mingling: After delving deep, you have made the decision that it is time to focus on your love life and become open-minded about what kinds of people you are going to date. You will attract the more spiritual types that are into things that aren’t typically your style, but you have a sudden interest in them. Also, your opposite sign Pisces will be more appealing to you, so this is a month of actually giving your polarities the chance to impress you.

All Coupled Up: This is going to feel like a time where you and your partner are psychically connected with one another. These highly connective vibes will help you two get how the other one is feeling causing the dreamy romantic side of your relationship to become stronger.

Libra

Single and Mingling: You’re going to be drawing in a type of individual who is clashing with what you are generally fascinated by personality-wise. You are going to get more of the Water Sign types in your day to day interactions. Energetically, you will be interested in the ones who were right under your nose this entire time which is going to catch you off guard but in an exciting way.

All Coupled Up: You’ve been looking for a way to change your relationship and make things balanced. This is your opportunity to finally get the harmony you deserve. Additionally, this transit causes your spouse to make more of an effort romantically which is going to help you let your guard down and be receptive to their affection.

Scorpio

Single and Mingling: This transit brings out your playful energy causing you to be ready for some social outings. The dreamy types with a sweet disposition and a way with words that blends like poetry will be more your style with this transit. You are into the intense kinds of people, and luckily this aspect brings in a barrage of what you’re into which are the artistic types, musicians, and even the kinds that are into theater or enjoy the art of acting.

All Coupled Up: Emotions that you have been holding back come to the surface because you need to express how you feel about your relationship. This is going to help your partner understand why you have been pulled back. Because you guys leave the drama behind you, the relationship has a chance to rekindle and bring back the flirty energy that brought you two together.

Sagittarius

Single and Mingling: People from your past come back around because some areas of your love life need to be revisited so that you can understand why situations might not have happened the way you hoped. However, some of this nostalgic energy brings in someone that might have been off your radar for a while and is now coming in for something more serious.

All Coupled Up: The two of you are desperately needing alone time at this point and finally can connect deeply. You guys will go over the things in your relationship that need repair and resolve them. This is going to be a healing time for your love life together because the habits that caused friction are finally put in the past where they belong.

Capricorn

Single and Mingling: You’re more chatty than usual so use this opportunity to be open to the new people coming into your life. There are going to be more potentials coming in that are all for an adventure and want to connect on a level that is both spiritual and intellectual. Even if you are not in the mood to go out don’t at all be surprised if a cool person slides in your DM’s.

All Coupled Up: You’re more open to expressing your emotions at this time and are able to admit you’re true feelings. Your partner is going to be receptive as well, and the two of you have an exchange that breaks a lot of ground but also allows the two of you to let your walls down and just be emotional for a change. Because you are finally showing a vulnerable side to your special someone, it actually helps them fall harder for you and start devoting more of their energy into the relationship.

Aquarius

Single and Mingling: Normally, you are a free spirit when it comes to dating, but this energy will have you wanting something more relationship oriented. You will be all about looking for something stable and wanting a relationship that isn’t as detached for a change. The best way to be emotionally open to a deep relationship is to start out as friends because this is where your comfort zone is, and it will allow you to not be so standoffish.

All Coupled Up: Adventures in adulting cause you and your partner to be interested in more sophisticated happenings. As dull as that might have seemed some time ago you guys decide to do something fancy which usually is not your speed, but it ends up being fun. The vibes are ultra-sensual with this transit causing you guys to indulge in each other’s company.

Pisces

Single and Mingling: It is beyond vital for you to meet someone who is aligned with your truth and can be the kind of partner that connects with you on a spiritual level. You will be attracting the high vibe types that are on the same wavelength. Surprisingly, you could run into a Virgo that has this quality causing the two of you to connect.

All Coupled Up: Even if you’ve been with your partner for awhile you are going to feel as though things are finally getting started. It’s like you two get a jumpstart and are able to be excited like you were in the beginning stages of dating each other. Romantically, your union becomes intense in a way that is everything you could have wanted from the relationship.

Transits

These are the transits that this celestial body will be making as it is in Pisces. I recommend looking at your chart on Astro.com to see where these aspects will affect you because this section is a reading for the collective and not your own Zodiac Sign.

Venus Square Mars Sensual and Not Afraid to Speak Up When Necessary

Venus Squares Mars in Gemini causing you to look at what you need regarding fun, change, and freedom in your love life. This transit is useful for causing you to act in your dating situations and finally putting yourself out there in a brave way. It is the source for friction in relationships so there might be an argumentized tone if you are with someone who is restrictive. Also, it is good for makeup sex, flirtation, and overall intimacy.

Venus Sextile Jupiter Your Lucky Match Maker

Just before Jupiter goes Retrograde, he lends you a helping hand in love and money. This aspect is powerful because Jupiter is the ancient ruler of Pisces and loves to celebrate when making aspects to Venus, so you have a ton of luck on your side. This transit will pull in new people that are worth knowing, it will cause you to be more alluring so you will attract others easily.

Venus SemiSquare Pluto Significant Relationships That Cause You to Transform and Heal Yourself

Use this transit to transform the areas of your love life that have left you in a place where you aren’t able to get over suspicions or issues with control in a relationship. In other words, if you have experienced a love life filled with power struggles, possessiveness, or insecurities that caused you to feel jealousy in any way this is going to give you the ability to heal. If this is a relationship that you are getting out of because a partner has been treating, you unfairly then it is time to take this opportunity to move forward.

Venus Sextile Uranus Keeping An Open Mind In Your Love Life

Uranus in Taurus lends some stability to your love life by opening up your options and allowing you to see the ones you generally overlook or who have been right under your nose this whole time. You will be curious about those who are different than you because this transit will cause your mind to think “Maybe my usual isn’t right for me!” This is going to open up a whole array of options for you.

Listen to Your Gut!

Spiritually, you will be more open and receptive to other energies so use this time to feel out if situations are right for you. Let your intuition guide you to making decisions in your love life because you will get a better opportunity to make the right choices on a level that is beyond the superficial. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/cleopatra-jade/2019/04/how-venus-in-pisces-will-heal-your-love-life-based-on-your-zodiac-sign/

Aries: March 21 – April 19th

  • Mixed signals
  • Unanswered messages
  • Constant mood swings

Taurus: April 20th – May 20th

  • Manipulative tendencies
  • Jealousy
  • Snooping through texts

Gemini: May 21st – June 20th

  • Keeping secrets
  • Lying about little things
  • Drinking too much

Cancer: June 21st – July 22nd

  • Canceled plans
  • Showing up late
  • Being against relationship labels

Leo: July 23rd – August 22nd

  • Cheating
  • Drug use
  • Heavy partying

Virgo: August 23rd – September 22nd

  • Laziness
  • Lack of direction
  • Immaturity

Libra: September 23rd – October 22nd

  • Short tempers
  • Pessimism
  • Acting pushy

Scorpio: October 23rd – November 21st

  • Neediness
  • Possessiveness
  • Passive agressiveness

Sagittarius: November 22nd – December 21st

  • Acting disrespectful
  • Refusing to apologize
  • Shifting the blame

Capricorn: December 22nd – January 19th

  • Ignorance
  • Hypocites
  • Social media addicts

Aquarius: January 20th – February 18th

  • Controlling behaviors
  • Gaslighting
  • Stories never lining up

Pisces: February 19th – March 20th

  • Bossy
  • Entitled
  • Superficial TC mark

Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2019/04/3-things-each-zodiac-sign-refuses-to-deal-with-in-modern-relationships/

1. Trying to hit on a woman by telling her how unattractive you find other types of women (i.e. telling a bigger woman how ugly you think skinny women are or vice versa).

2. Bragging about fights or going to jail. Literally no one cares.

3. Bragging about your sex life. I don’t want to know how many girls want you. It literally does nothing for me except think you maybe are kinda a tool to girls.

4. Being “stupid” or clueless about “feminine things.”

Like I see girls talk about asking their boyfriends to pick up tampons and laughing at how the poor things just CANNOT navigate the aisle to save their lives as if it’s endearing or something.

Like, can’t he read? Tampax pearl, regular, 18 count. Pick up the box and go, ya dolt.

5. Frowning or looking “alpha” in pictures. Nearly every dating site picture has a guy, backwards baseball cap, sternly looking at camera. Sunglasses optional. I want to date someone who is friendly and can smile!

6. Calling other men unmasculine because they don’t like a certain hobby/movie/music/tv. Nothing says insecure more than this to me, in fact, I find it more masculine to just like what you like regardless of others opinions on the matter.

7. Bragging about how much they can drink.

8. Being ‘too cool’ to do anything. It shows you’re vulnerable and self-conscious and you don’t have an ounce of real confidence. Way more attracted to a man who isn’t afraid to laugh at himself opposed to one that is.

9. Reckless driving. every date I’ve ever been on where a guy has come to pick me up he has fucking sped waaay over the speed limit and did that douchey one arm leaning on the window the other on the wheel thing… are you trying to fucking kill me wtf.

10. Doing that thing during sex where you move your hips in a circle. I would say 1/2 of all dudes I’ve fucked, and trust me that number is uncomfortably high, do that move and it does nothing for me. It does however take me out of the moment and cause me to think “What? This? Again?”

11. When it’s hot and heavy and you go straight for the vajayjay. No foreplay except for some kisses. That gets so boring.

When you shove your dick into my neck like a battering ram. I need to use my esophagus later to swallow food.

When you think we will think less of you when you say “I don’t know”. Its ok if you don’t know, just don’t pretend to know something you don’t.

When you think we will think less of you if you show emotion. I don’t need you blowing snot bubbles and weeping uncontrollably, but a few tears every blue moon, or something lets me know you have a soul.

When you call other women bitches or hoes.

When every time I put my hand on your arm, you immediately flex your bicep. You just made it weird.

When you fuck like a porn star. I don’t want to have my back twisted and my legs bent like pretzels in a position where I can hardly breathe while you drip sweat all over me and I’m holding in a fart. Can we find a position we both enjoy?

When you talk shit about your boys or your boys’ people over petty stuff. I know some of y’all, men and women, live for drama, but I don’t get down like that.

12. Claiming to be an “Alpha” or putting other people down.

Trashing other people is just lame. There’s a hundred conversations we could have and you wanna talk about the waitresses’ weight? And the alpha bullshit is, to borrow a phrase, “beta af”.

13. Constant Flirting. Yeah I mean, its cute and all but I would also like to have a conversation without you commenting on me. I just want a decent conversation, and your here flirting. Ya’ know what i’m getting at?

14. I hate it when guys try too hard to be the “MANLY MAN.” Like, Dave, I’ve been on my own for awhile, I can open a jar of salsa.

15. How much they party or did party in their past. I don’t party at all, and I have nothing against people who do, but I don’t wanna hear about all the times you got wasted in high school.

16. Getting aggressive towards people.. that’s not impressive or manly, it’s scary AF.

17. Showing people intimate photos you received from girls who trusted you. It’s cheap and despicable af.

18. Being mean to people. Some guys think they have to be mean to be manly. Give me a kind one any day.

19. Those guys who follow the predatory ‘pick up artist’ crap, who do stuff like compliment by insulting you or just all around be ‘alpha’ or ‘chads’ or something stupid. I met a guy who thought and acted like this once, my favorite line he said was ‘married women are the hardest to score, but they’re the best’, and tried his hardest to sleep with me too and didn’t stop trying when he found out I’m gay, said that ‘oh yeah, I’ve screwed some lesbians too’. Absolute mind cancer.

20. Being mean to/about their moms. I hope this isn’t as common as my experience has made it out to be. I’ve known many guys who talk about their moms like they’re these annoying idiots or something, constantly bitching about them or putting them down really casually. And I’ve met a lot of those moms, and most have been lovely.

21. That throat thing where they go overboard trying to bring up phlegm and spit on the pavement. It’s disgusting honestly.

22. Your cologne. Jesus Christ, spray the lightest mist in front of you and step through it ONCE (before you dress)– that is all you need. Stop fucking dowsing yourself in it, you don’t smell good and you are choking everyone around you with the obnoxious scent and triggering my migraines.

23. Guys who refuse to do something because they perceive it to be a shot against their masculinity. Eg. Refusing to admit whether they think another male would be considered as attractive or not, cos they ‘aint gay’.

No one was thinking that. It doesnt make you sound tough – just insecure and lame IMO

24. When guys have pictures of them holding large sums of money in their tinder profile. The second I see someone caressing a wad of 20 dollar bills, my vagina disappears into a black hole.

25. I really don’t like when guys are sooo insistent on paying on the first date. I’m someone who hates being in debt to people and having the guy pay makes me feel like I owe him something at the end of the night. Even if that’s not the case, it shifts the power balance and that makes me uncomfortable.

I guess what I’m saying is it’s always nice to offer, but if she says no, then just deal with your shit and split the check. It doesn’t make you less of a man.

26. For me… excessive winking. Cannot handle it at all.

27. Popped collars.

28. Pushing boundaries. If I say I don’t wanna satisfy your fetish, or send you nudes, or talk about your naked body, etc over whatever online tool we’re using to interact, then I don’t. I was literally asked by a guy I know to change my personality, just so I could satisfy his fetish. I’m happily married (not to him) and he knows it.

29. I hate smooth talking. It sounds super fake. And if you’re actually fairly good at it, that just means you’ve been practicing talking the panties off the ladies for awhile. It’s really no win.

30. Talking shit about all your “crazy” ex girlfriends. Either you have strikingly bad taste or they probably weren’t the problem…

31. When they are desperate to get their dick wet at any possible opportunity. Men with self control and standards are much more respectable.

32. Dick pics. Never in my life have I ever asked for one or even wanted to receive one, yet men hand them out like business cards. Please stop.

33. Bragging about their bodies or hours logged at the gym.

34. Saying they don’t order “girly” drinks. Instead of making them look manly, it just makes them look insecure. If you like the way something tastes, just order it instead of puffing your chest and expecting a gold star. There’s better ways to start a conversation than that.

35. Loud ass cars, that shit is just annoying and makes you seem like an asshole.

36. Pulling out and slapping their penis on the vag, like in porn. Doesn’t do much, but thanks I guess?

Most stuff guys see in porn and try irl is a no for me.

37. Bad hygiene. I don’t know why some men believe that their manly sweat will drive a woman wild. Not if you don’t wash regularly.

38. The “bro” talk. Every other word being “bro.”

39. Guys who constantly compliment a women’s body or try to touch it. Sorry but “You have a nice butt” “you have nice/big titties” isn’t nice to hear all the time, we have personalities and other things about us too!

40. Negging. There is nothing remotely attractive about emotional manipulation.

41. Assuming that because they’re the guy, they’re automatically better at things than women, like working out, video games, cars, guns, careers, etc.

42. Aggression. I have been in a few abusive relationships (emotional, physical and sexual). Even just a guy saying he wants to beat the shit out of someone scares tf out of me.

43. Asking for nudes.

44. Bragging about money and expensive stuff they own.

45. Not doing (or just hiding) things that are considered “girly”. Ex. sharing feelings / thoughts, admitting they want to see a chick flick, getting a mani / pedi / facial or something without being forced to.

46. Helicopters. I can’t stress this enough. Spinning your dick in circles does nothing for us.

47. Claiming they can drive well while drunk.

48. Saggy pants.

49. Comparing us to other women, even if it’s meant to compliment us. It’s not a compliment for me if you need to push someone else down while saying it, fyi. “Usually the girls I see here are so shallow and stupid [insert possible rant about the way they dress and the things they supposedly enjoy, maybe drop the word “hoe” or “bitch” somewhere], but you…”

All I hear at that point is basically “I hate women but I want sex so I fake that you’re an exception.”

50. I had a boyfriend once tell me how he had sex at an early age (like 12), and in a very “aren’t you impressed?” sort of fashion. I thought it was a little gross, and asked how he got into the situation. He then told me that it was a party or some sort of get together, and he had sex with a girl he thought that was cute, and it turned out to be his cousin.

We broke up soon after, and I haven’t talked to him in years. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2019/04/50-things-that-are-going-to-turn-her-off-not-make-her-sleep-with-you/

1. When I see my wife check out other men in front of me. I can fully accept she will find other people attractive in life and I’m fine with that. But on the odd occasion when we’re out and we’re talking and I see her eyes track someone and I look to see what’s interesting and it’s another guy.

2. I’m a really skinny dude and people think I don’t already know that. Like, you wouldn’t go up to someone overweight and say wow you’re so fat, so why is the opposite acceptable to constantly do?

3. My weight in comparison to my girlfriend. She’s a fitness instructor while I work a desk job, I’m not huge or anything but for example we went to Mexico and took pictures on the beach, she looks like a VS model and I look like I like pasta. Which I do.

4. I don’t even know if my dick is a size that’s considered small or large and I’m still insecure about it.

5. I’m a sensitive dude. I always interpreted it as a strength and women value it immensely that I can just talk about my emotions and have empathy and shit.

I’m incredibly scared that it’s “too much” for most to get into a relationship or that I’ll be abandoned because of it.

6. Long term bachelorhood. It literally affects every single component of your life and factors into, if not outright propagates other various anxieties. Fear of dying alone? Long-term single doesn’t help. Fear of social interactions? Again, long-term really doesn’t help. Lack of motivation of self-improvement? You’ve guessed, being long-term single only compounds these issues.

7. My lack of “manly” traits. I don’t enjoy sports, I don’t drink, I don’t own any guns, I don’t really enjoy sex or hookup culture, etc. There is nothing wrong with liking those things in the slightest, but in my small town it makes me feel isolated from other male friends.

And my body. I feel really, really uncomfortable taking my shirt off at a pool party or something similar. While I know the expectation is unrealistic, I feel lesser for not being fit.

8. My man boobies.

I’m in good shape. A lot of people would argue fantastic shape. Muscular, six-pack-in-the-right-light lean, tall, broad, and barrel chested.

I still have man boobies. Not gyno, not a little spot of breast tissue behind the nipple, no. Just a long strip of normal fat that goes from my clavicle, under my pec and to the back of my armpits that WILL NOT DIE.

I have sacrificed so much and worked so hard to be proud of my body (former childhood morbid obesity), yet despite being at <8% bf at one point, my man boobies will never, ever go away. It’s really depressing.

9. Random erectile dysfunction, shit just strikes like lightening sometimes and it sucks.

10. I hate that I’m losing my hair before 30. Baldness does not agree with me.

11. My height.

12. Comparing myself to other guys my age. Most have moved out of their parents houses, some have kids. I’m getting there but I feel I am so far behind.

13. When the girl you’re dating starts talking to you about her exes, especially when she still keeps in touch with some of them…

14. My mental illness. I make it very difficult to care about me “long term” because of it. It has a tendency to cause me to push people away, especially when I need their support the most.

15. My uselessness in relationships. I’ve been married and divorced, and I’ve been dating for ages now, but I don’t think I’m any good at bringing anything particularly valuable to a relationship.

16. After being cheated on it’s pretty hard to believe anybody could actually have genuine feelings for me.

Being incredibly awkward and shy does not help the above.

17. My weight. I’ve been 115lbs for a majority of my life at 5″9. Been told a bit from leaders inside the company telling me “I need to eat more” to people leaving comments on my pictures the same. Doctors have always told me that I was healthy at that weight – it just is as it is.

Been making a change and the last five months I’ve added 17 lbs to about 132. But its been a very difficult journey – eating and being bloated and constantly cooking enough. The gym has been good to me though.

18. Limited sexual experience.

19. My lack of drive. Lack of achievements and seeing any endeavor all the way through. I see it as cowardliness and incompetence.

20. My teeth.

21. Faults that people have said I have, apparently my hands are on the smaller side, didn’t notice but now I hide them at every opportunity.

22. My social awkwardness. I cannot talk to strangers well. I do not have that skill. I wished I did but due to being bullied as a kid and me being major consumer of anime, I had a hard time making a lot of friends. Let alone having much in common with a lot of people especially at my workplace.

23. Constantly swiping right on apps never getting a match.

24. My small penis size, the fact I am a virgin at 27, the fact I don’t know how to kiss or be in a relationship.

25. My hair. Even if I was the last person on Earth I’d want great hair, unfortunately I inherited shitty genetics. I resent my parents far more than I’ll ever reveal to them.

26. My income. I feel so darn obligated to earn a wage and support myself and my fiancée and it makes me so insecure. I’m always nervous about the mortgage, paying bills and providing for our household. It’s not even like I don’t make a good wage or can’t afford things. Nor does she expect me to pay for everything. I just feel obligated to do it and stress over it all the time.

27. My high voice, which probably caused my social anxiety. It sounds like I never went through puberty. (I am 19 yo) And phone calls are exceptionally awkward. I am less self-aware of it after I learnt to deepen my voice, but it had gotten to a phase where I would only use signs to answer basic question (like nodding and pointing to objects).

28. When a woman is taller than me (I’m only 5’6” so taller than most woman but a good amount of women are taller than me).

29. Seeing these younger guys my age in BMW’s pull up next to you and stare. I get it dude, I’m in a Honda. Please keep staring. I see your girlfriend in there too, and no – I’m not going to salivate over your 2007 3 series with 150K miles.

30. My man boobs.

31. Sincerely opening up in a relationship. I think most guys have a not necessarily fake, but a shallow superficial opening up we do mainly in relationships. Like oh I secretly like rom coms or I actually really dig looking at flowers. Like a nice little hidden soft side for SO’s to discover but it isn’t too soft because that would be a problem. I’m not able to show her the real raw stuff. I guess I’m insecure about opening up about my insecurities

32. When my girl doesn’t reply or seems really distant. I’ve no clue what’s wrong or what I can do to help.

33. My lack of wealth. I don’t care about money, but I do care about being stopped by security in stores on the assumption I am there to rob it.

34. The fact that I have a bigger ass than all of my past girlfriends.

35. I’m a fucking weird person. I feel like I was made differently. There is many people who say they are weird, many who want to be seen as weird. But to be actually different suck’s so much dick.

36. My trust issues with everyone I meet, I have been backstabbed many times, by many people. It sucks.

37. I “grew up” and got my shit together pretty late in life. I’m insecure about my future. I’m constantly worried abut a lack of seniority at my job and I’m pretty sure that I’m probably never going to retire. I’ll probably work until I die.

38. My social skills in front of women that are attractive. Even if I have no plans to pursue something.

39. The fact that I’ve never had a girlfriend and I’m 23 going on 24. Growing up my dad always told me that the time would come but sometimes I begin to think that its just never going to come.

40. A group of women laughing loudly when I happen to be walking by.

41. My seeming inability to fall in love again. What if it’s broken after that one ex and now I’m stuck, unable to fully invest into someone again? What if I’m just dooming all my future relationships to failure before they even begin?

Also, my dick. It could be 9″ long and I’d still be insecure about it.

42. The feeling that everyone depends on you while you don’t have anyone to depend on.

43. My looks, my personality, my income, my car.

44. Seeing other men younger than me doing better than me.

Fuck it’s like every 25 year old I see has a better job, drives a better car, has a better relationship with other people, eats better food, travels to more places. I feel like a fucking loser every time and it just reminds me why I’m, still single and nobody wants me.

45. People laughing at me for a mistake. I never want to participate in anything again.

46. Being told I’m creepy. A woman at a bar 7 years ago called me creepy because I maintained eye contact during a conversation. I got so insecure about that, that I no longer maintain eye contact with anyone for longer than 3 seconds. It actually made my gf insecure because she thought I never wanted to look at her. Feels bad, man.

47. The fact that when I broke up with my ex, that all our “mutual friends” disowned me. They were never my friends, they were her’s. Made me question all friendships. Luckily I do have a few strong ones today.

48. My skinny chicken legs.

49. I wish I was about 50 lbs lighter. Working on it though.

50. The general sense of loneliness an failure which makes me feel pathetic. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2019/04/50-things-you-never-realized-guys-were-insecure-about/

Empathy is an interesting gift to have.

Being an empath means you are highly sensitive and emotional and can sometimes confuse others’ emotions as your own. Sure, that’s good when you need to be empathetic and sympathetic. But what happens if feeling all the feels takes over your life?

If you’re an empath…

You care a lot about everyone and everything.

You give so much of yourself to other people.

You’re intuitive and sensitive to others’ feelings.

You love hard.

But…what about you? 

Are you taking care of yourself? Are you in tune with your own feelings? What are you actually doing with the love you want to give? Are you leaving anything for yourself?

You have so much love to give and you’re giving it to people who don’t deserve it or you. You’re giving your love to manipulative people or people who aren’t in touch with their emotions and so they suck all of yours out of you.

People gravitate towards you – you have this magnetic pull. It’s like they know you’ll put them first and you’ll be more than willing to help them with their problems. You put all of your energy into the reactions and feelings of others, rather than who you are and what your truth is.

If you’re an empath, you have a hard time loving yourself. 

Believe me, I know how to hard it is to put yourself first, especially as an empath. I have so much love to give and I just want someone to accept me, appreciate me, and respect me and my love. So far, no one has proven themselves worthy and that’s okay! That just means I need to keep that love for myself.

If you’re an empath, you need to remember: self-love is not selfish. 

Do what makes you feel good, whatever it is. Maybe that’s self care – taking a bath, putting on a face mask, drinking water. Maybe that’s starting a new hobby to occupy your mind – yoga, painting, knitting, kickboxing, photography. Maybe that’s meditating or creating a vision board. Maybe that’s just forgiving yourself or giving yourself a break every once in a while.

Stop putting so much effort into those who don’t appreciate you. Put that energy into appreciating yourself for once. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/kelly-peacock/2019/04/why-its-hard-to-love-yourself-if-youre-an-empath/

1. “Stupid people can believe in anything, so you can believe in yourself!”

2. “I think we’ve all got something to bring to this discussion, and from now on I think the thing you should bring is silence.”

3. I was once told I was more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.

4. Somewhere in France, a cathedral is missing a gargoyle.

5. If Mr. Rogers was your neighbor, he’d move.

6. You’re like a lighthouse in the middle of a desert; Bright, but not a lot of use.

7. “Your life is more about regret management than goal achievement, isn’t it?”

8. A young girl asked me if I had Chicken Pox due to my acne.

9. The best I’ve ever heard is, “Everyone that has ever loved you was wrong.”

10. “You’re less a person and more a loose collection of personality flaws.”

11. “You’re not pretty enough to get away with being that stupid.”

12. “The world is a better place when you’re asleep.”

13. “Apologize to that tree over there for wasting the oxygen that it worked so hard to make.”

14. I died when I heard a kid say, “You look like you came from a donation pile.”

15. “This is why everyone talks about you behind your back.”

16. “You will have a sparsely attended funeral.”

17. A friend once said I was not being the person Mister Rogers knew I could be.

18. You’re no trial and all error.

19. “Do you have life insurance?”

“Yes?”

“Congratulations, you are objectively worth more dead than alive.”

20. “I hope every single light is red on your way home today. No, all week!”

21. “What color was the crayon you used on your application?”

22. “You’re the patient 0 of dumbness aren’t you?”

23. “I hope you get run over by a parked car.”

24. A nun once told me “Jesus would absolutely despise you.” I was in kindergarten and didn’t know what despise meant.

25. “See, this right here. This is why you’re destined to be a bitter old man, cold and alone as you slowly waste away. No one will notice when you die, and the only thing you will leave behind is a history of petty, pointless hate. The world will be a little bit better when you’re gone.”

26. “Are you going out looking like that?” After having worked hard on my hair/makeup/outfit.

27. Someone was trying to insult me, I responded with “I don’t respect you enough to be insulted by you.”

28. My dad called someone a “model human being”, and then muttered “yeah, a non-working facsimile of the real thing” under his breath.

29. I was having a conversation with my wife on one occasion, and I asked her a question.

She responded with “I don’t know, I wasn’t listening. You stopped saying things of value two sentences ago.”

30. A toddler once told my sister, “I like your mustache” while gently poking her upper lip.

31. “Bob Ross would call you a mistake.”

32. ‘You’re not even your Mom’s favorite child.’ He was an only child. LOL.

33. “Retake the picture so I can be in it. It’ll look a lot better” – my younger sister when I was taking a selfie.

34. “The only culture you have is bacteria.”

35. “You sneeze like a squirrel.” It wasn’t the words so much as it was the sheer look of disdain and the disgust in that 9 year old’s voice.

36. “Daddy, you are boring, and you have stinky feet.”

I swear I want that on my tombstone.

37. My card was declined buying a coffee and a 14 year old girl next to me offered to pay for it because: “She could tell I really needed a win.”

38. May you be living proof that man can endure anything.

39. I was called a gray sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake… harsh.

40. “The worst thing about your guitar playing is that you don’t know how bad you are at it.”

41. I was pestering my then girlfriend/now wife and she turned to me and said “You need to go home and think about everything you are. Then change it.”

My jaw dropped and she immediately started apologizing. She had meant it to be kinda snotty, but realized how harsh it had come out and felt bad. I actually thought it was kinda funny, but I still tease her about it some times.

42. It’s impossible to underestimate you.

43. I work in an an office with kind of separate pods, but it’s not uncommon for someone from another pod to talk to someone in mine. Best one I’ve heard so far, called out in a dead silent office:

“Dylan,”

“Yeah what?”

“I’m going to invite your mum out for dinner and then not turn up.”

44. Got into the office, go to sit down, and before I can even get in the chair a guy walks into the office and goes “Did you go to college? Because it must haven taken years of training for anyone to be this useless. You clearly got the Master’s Degree.”

I’d never met or seen this man before in my life. He apparently thought I was somebody else in the IT office, and just decided to lay into me.

45. “I wish you were a speed bump for my tricycle.” From my sister when we were 4 or 5.

46. Someone called me a crunchy lizard once, in reference to my hair gel.

I asked why that was a bad thing.

She said, “A crunchy lizard is not a happy lizard.”

47. Not me, but my wife.

My wife’s father died about twelve years ago from cancer. We’ve been open with the kids about it, since they never got to know their grandpa (he passed before my wife and I married.)

A couple of weeks ago, I accepted a job out of state and I’m currently geographically separated from my family. I’m going to move them here once the school year ends.

Well, the day I left, my wife was feeling pretty blue and was listening to a sad song while she did the laundry. My little girl walked into the room and asked to use the computer.

“After this song is over,” my wife replied.

“It’s a sad song,” my little girl observed.

“I feel a little sad today.”

“Why are you sad, Mommy? Is it because your dad is dead and your husband left?”

It’s since become a running family joke.

48. That quote from full metal jacket always gets me good.

“Your parents have any kids that lived?”

“Yeah…?”

“I bet they regret that.”

49. My 7yo sister had kissed a boy in school and I was joking about it, like ‘oooh, you kissed him on the lips’. She then proceeded to write me a note next to her drawing of me: “I kissed a boy but you are 26 and still don’t have a boyfriend. That’s a funnier joke.” It really hurt.

50. Me : “What are you doing on Friday?”

Girl: “I’m washing my hair.”

(Oblivious) Me: “So what about Saturday?”

Girl: “I’ll think of something.” TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2019/04/50-brutal-pg-rated-insults-to-throw-at-your-friends/

Aries: March 21 – April 19th

“An apology without change is just manipulation”

— Pending…. (@_SierraMonaee) March 16, 2019

Taurus: April 20th – May 20th

When someone has seen the worst side of you & still decides to stay, that's when you know they're worth keeping. Not everyone is willing to ride with you when times get tough. Appreciate those who remain by your side, they're are the one who deserves you at your best.

— 𝓼𝓱𝓪𝓱 (@shahyyraa) March 31, 2019

Gemini: May 21st – June 20th

i tend to catastrophize everything and assume the absolute worst outcome of every situation. however, i'm trying to remind myself of my own power, and that i've been through a lot and am still standing. if you do the same, take a second to remember your power, too.

— Rosemary Donahue (@rosadona) April 3, 2019

Cancer: June 21st – July 22nd

hey, you definitely need to work hard and put in the effort in order to achieve your dreams and goals. 100%. But take care of yourself too. You’re not going to get any closer to what you want if you’re burying yourself into the ground.

— Lacey Ramburger (@laceypaige20) March 30, 2019

Leo: July 23rd – August 22nd

) ) )
) ( ) )
_(___(____)____(___(__
you don't have to /
love yourself / |
fully in order /____|
to be loved /
__________/

— kendra syrdal👻 (@kendrasyrdal) March 20, 2019

Virgo: August 23rd – September 22nd

Are you really lazy or have you conditioned yourself to believe that you should be working all the time?

— Morgan Jerkins (@MorganJerkins) February 13, 2019

Libra: September 23rd – October 22nd

When you’re the person who is always strong for others, allowing yourself to unravel, and to feel your very valid emotions, is the most healing thing you can do. Giving yourself permission to embrace your humanness just as unapologetically as you do for others is key.

— Bianca Sparacino (@BiancaSparacino) February 19, 2019

Scorpio: October 23rd – November 21st

Here is a thing I believe more than almost anything: The route to self-love and self-acceptance and self-appreciation starts not with your thoughts about yourself, but with your thoughts about others.

— Heidi Priebe (@HeidiPriebe1) April 1, 2019

Sagittarius: November 22nd – December 21st

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give the right things a chance to catch you.

— Inspirational Quotes (@Inspire_Us) April 4, 2019

Capricorn: December 22nd – January 19th

Your art is valuable and does not require suffering.

— Gennifer Hutchison (@GennHutchison) February 5, 2019

Aquarius: January 20th – February 18th

Your soulmate is really just the person you want to watch Netflix with every night.

— Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) February 8, 2019

Pisces: February 19th – March 20th

People often say “I don’t know how you do it all,” and the answer it turns out is I neglect myself and so I’m not going to do that anymore.

— Alexander Chee (@alexanderchee) March 24, 2019

TC mark

Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/january-nelson/2019/04/the-reminder-each-zodiac-sign-deserves-this-april/

You probably already know that another person can complete you. There is nobody that can fit into the god and self and love-sized gaps within you. You probably already know that other people do not exist to be salves to your wounds, and yet you probably act like it regardless.

Using another person to complete yourself is not just getting into a monogamous relationship and relying on it for your friends and wellness and sense of self. It is so much deeper than that.

Using another person to complete you is looking around and identifying the ways you are measurably better than others, and then using that fact to validate how good you really are. It is creating a silent but pervasive competition between you and everyone you know, a place where there is no room for growth or kindness. A place where this is only room for scrutiny and envy.

Using another person to complete you is playing the comparison game in your favor, and doing it constantly. It is rigging the system in your own mind to ensure that you are always on top. It is being driven more by social cues of success than the feeling of deep, whole fulfillment. It is being more inspired by how good you will seem than how great your life could actually be. 

When we are truly empty and unable to convince ourselves that we are, indeed, worthy of goodness and friendship and love and life, we need to put other people down to rise. This is not a good place to be, because when we cast our judgments out at others, we are actually caging ourselves. The less okay we determine other people are, the less okay we make ourselves.

Because if we criticize someone for settling down, we are going to resist settling down, even if it’s what we want more than anything. If we judge someone for owning their sexuality, we are going to deny ours, even if it is a desire that burns more deeply than anything else. If we are constantly picking apart the ways other people are not as successful as they seem, guess what we will also do to ourselves?

Other people cannot fix you. They cannot heal you. They cannot make you whole.

They can help you, they can guide you. They can offer you wisdom, and if they are kind enough, maybe some love or support. But they cannot do the work that is yours. They cannot close those gaps, they cannot make you feel okay about your existence. Only you have the power to do that.

And the best place to start is by understanding that you cannot devalue one person to inflate the worthiness of another, especially when that person is you. If you live with the goal to just be better than, you will inevitably place yourself in a mental state of being beneath. Neither is helpful, and neither is true.

There are strengths that are uniquely yours. There are skills others have mastered that you couldn’t even begin to attempt. This is not a valuation of your personhood, this is just reality. We all have strengths and weaknesses that, over time, balance one another out. Maybe we are more proficient at one thing, but we are certainly less capable at another. We cannot see the whole by the sum of a few parts.

So when you want to compare, and judge, and bully your way into feeling better about yourself, remember this. Remember that what you say about others, you are saying about yourself. What you judge in others, you will judge in yourself. This is not some mystical law of karma, this is how our minds operate. We need consistency. When we create rules for others, we unconsciously follow them, too.

So stop thinking that another person can make you feel easy and ready and happy to be alive. That is your load to lift and burden to carry. And if you cannot yet love yourself completely, try to work from the outside in. Validate and affirm and praise and appreciate everything you can about everyone you know. Start small, and stay genuine. But if you do it consistently enough, all that light you shine on others will eventually illuminate you, too. TC mark


Source: https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2019/04/another-person-is-not-a-salve-to-your-wounds-so-stop-relying-on-others-to-fix-you/

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